The Dumbest Quotes About Deep Throat
Thursday June 2, 2005
The unmasking of Deep Throat has ushered in a wave of historical revisionism and recriminations from Watergate convicts and Nixon apologists. Here's a sampling of some of the week's more mind-boggling sound bites:
"There's something deadly serious here. People that brought down Nixon also resulted in the fall of South Vietnam, the death of hundreds of thousands of people. ... Nixon was brought down by people who were a hell of a lot worse than he was." —Former Nixon speechwriter Pat Buchanan
"Had they not brought down Nixon, we wouldn't have lost Vietnam. Had [they] not brought down Nixon, the Khmer Rouge would not have come to power and murdered two million people in a full-fledged genocide." —Talk radio host Rush Limbaugh
"He is someone who behaved unethically in that he did not take his evidence to the grand jury and seek an indictment." —Convicted Watergate felon G. Gordon Liddy
"Mark Felt could have stopped Watergate. Instead, he goes out and basically undermines the administration." —Convicted Watergate felon Chuck Colson
"If they had called me and said they had evidence of criminal activity going on in the White House, I would have walked into the Oval Office myself, only because you want to deal with that quickly. So I think if he handled it — if he'd come and dealt with it man-to-man, I know everybody says there was a lot of paranoia in Washington those days, that's a lot of nonsense, people were, the whole government was functioning during this period of time, there was a grand jury sitting. He could have gone to the grand jury." —Chuck Colson
"To think that he was out, going around in back alleys at night, looking for flower pots, passing information to someone, it's just so demeaning." —Chuck Colson
"Were there heroes of Watergate? Surely many unknown ones, those who did their best to be constructive and not destructive, those who didn't think it was all about their beautiful careers. I'll give you a candidate for great man of the era: Chuck Colson." —Former Reagan speechwriter Peggy Noonan
"I view him as a troubled man. I don't think it's heroic to act as a spy on your president when you're in high office. I could fully understand if he resigned ... or if he went to the prosecutor. That would be heroic." —Former Nixon Secretary of State Henry Kissinger
"This is the great boast of the enemies of Richard Nixon, including Mark Felt: they made the conditions necessary for the Cambodian genocide. If there is such a thing as kharma, if there is such a thing as justice in this life of the next, Mark Felt has bought himself the worst future of any man on this earth. And Bob Woodward is right behind him, with Ben Bradlee bringing up the rear. Out of their smug arrogance and contempt, they hatched the worst nightmare imaginable: genocide. I hope they are happy now -- because their future looks pretty bleak to me." —Former Nixon speechwriter Ben Stein
And the funniest quote:
"If Mark Felt really is Deep Throat, all we can say is: Oh. Him. Um, now what do we do?" —Washington Post columnist Joel Achenbach
Related:
• Today's Political Quotes (About Political Humor)
• The Dumbest Quotes of 2004 (About Political Humor)
• Don't Follow The Money (New York Times)
• If Watergate Happened Today (Newsweek)
• Media Hosted Watergate Convicts Without Revealing Their Roles in the Scandal (Media Matters)
• Gagging on Deep Throat (PERRspectives)
"There's something deadly serious here. People that brought down Nixon also resulted in the fall of South Vietnam, the death of hundreds of thousands of people. ... Nixon was brought down by people who were a hell of a lot worse than he was." —Former Nixon speechwriter Pat Buchanan
"Had they not brought down Nixon, we wouldn't have lost Vietnam. Had [they] not brought down Nixon, the Khmer Rouge would not have come to power and murdered two million people in a full-fledged genocide." —Talk radio host Rush Limbaugh
"He is someone who behaved unethically in that he did not take his evidence to the grand jury and seek an indictment." —Convicted Watergate felon G. Gordon Liddy
"Mark Felt could have stopped Watergate. Instead, he goes out and basically undermines the administration." —Convicted Watergate felon Chuck Colson
"If they had called me and said they had evidence of criminal activity going on in the White House, I would have walked into the Oval Office myself, only because you want to deal with that quickly. So I think if he handled it — if he'd come and dealt with it man-to-man, I know everybody says there was a lot of paranoia in Washington those days, that's a lot of nonsense, people were, the whole government was functioning during this period of time, there was a grand jury sitting. He could have gone to the grand jury." —Chuck Colson
"To think that he was out, going around in back alleys at night, looking for flower pots, passing information to someone, it's just so demeaning." —Chuck Colson
"Were there heroes of Watergate? Surely many unknown ones, those who did their best to be constructive and not destructive, those who didn't think it was all about their beautiful careers. I'll give you a candidate for great man of the era: Chuck Colson." —Former Reagan speechwriter Peggy Noonan
"I view him as a troubled man. I don't think it's heroic to act as a spy on your president when you're in high office. I could fully understand if he resigned ... or if he went to the prosecutor. That would be heroic." —Former Nixon Secretary of State Henry Kissinger
"This is the great boast of the enemies of Richard Nixon, including Mark Felt: they made the conditions necessary for the Cambodian genocide. If there is such a thing as kharma, if there is such a thing as justice in this life of the next, Mark Felt has bought himself the worst future of any man on this earth. And Bob Woodward is right behind him, with Ben Bradlee bringing up the rear. Out of their smug arrogance and contempt, they hatched the worst nightmare imaginable: genocide. I hope they are happy now -- because their future looks pretty bleak to me." —Former Nixon speechwriter Ben Stein
And the funniest quote:
"If Mark Felt really is Deep Throat, all we can say is: Oh. Him. Um, now what do we do?" —Washington Post columnist Joel Achenbach
Related:
• Today's Political Quotes (About Political Humor)
• The Dumbest Quotes of 2004 (About Political Humor)
• Don't Follow The Money (New York Times)
• If Watergate Happened Today (Newsweek)
• Media Hosted Watergate Convicts Without Revealing Their Roles in the Scandal (Media Matters)
• Gagging on Deep Throat (PERRspectives)
Comments
Haha these are so funny! Thanks