Gen. Petraeus and the Iraq Progress Report

The late-night comedians weigh in on Gen. Petraeus's Iraq progress report:

"Earlier today was the big Iraq report. General Petraeus said the troops can start coming home next summer. ... I believe his exact words were, 'And then it's Hillary's mess.'" --David Letterman

"Another big day on Capitol Hill. General Petraeus testified again today before Congress about the Iraq war. Some Democrats are claiming that Petraeus' answers are scripted by President Bush. Which explains Petraeus' use of the word 'surgerrific.'" --Conan O'Brien

"Petraeus gave his progress report on Iraq to Congress. Many of the senators commented to the general. Senator Barbara Boxer said Petraeus was overly optimistic; Mel Martinez of Florida thanked the general; Senator Larry Craig of Idaho said, 'There's something about a man in uniform.'" --Jay Leno

"General Petraeus was in Washington testifying before the Senate. After the testimony, Senator Craig said, 'You may not know this, general, but right now I'm saluting you.'" --David Letterman

Read more late-night jokes...

See also:
The Petraeus Report in Editorial Cartoons (Cagle)
The Daily Show on the Petraeus Report (Comedy Central)
Leave General Petraeus Alone (YouTube video)
Petraeus and Crocker Face Hume Humiliation (MadKane)
Bush Caught in Stall with Male Prostitute (Satirical Political Report)