Two of the late-night comedians' favorite punching bags, Dennis Kucinich and Fred Thompson, bowed out of the presidential race this week. Enjoy a last laugh at their expense:

Dennis Kucinich

"Dennis Kucinich dropped out of the presidential race. Dennis's campaign slogan was 'Don't look back.' He chose that slogan because there was never anybody behind him." --Jay Leno

"Dennis Kucinich says he once saw a UFO. I'm thinking to myself, 'Saw one? My God, it looks like he's been riding one'" --David Letterman

"The fact that he has no chance whatsoever has not slowed Dennis Kucinich down at all. I don't blame him though, because when you look like a Keebler Elf and your wife looks like this [on screen: Elizabeth Kucinich], how can you help but believe that anything is possible?" --Jimmy Kimmel

Read more Dennis Kucinich jokes…

See also:
Kucinich’s Exit Stuns Lone Supporter (Borowitz Report)
Dennis Kucinich: 'I Did' See a UFO (About.com Political Humor)
Candidate Kucinich: Who Needs Audio? (David Letterman)

Fred Thompson

"I don't know if you heard this or not but Fred Thompson has dropped out of the presidential race. Don't worry about Fred, he can always go back to his prestigious fake law firm. ... Fred spent all day packing the bags under his eyes." --David Letterman

"Fred Thompson said he is out trying to revitalize his campaign. What does he mean 're'? When was it vitalized?" --Jay Leno

Read more Fred Thompson jokes…

See also:
Fred Thompson Drops Out (Daily Show)
A Brief History of the Fred Thompson Campaign (RJ Matson)
Fred Thompson Fears Presidential Run Will Typecast Him As Politician (The Onion)
Fred Thompson Launches Presidential Bid (Tonight Show)