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Daniel Kurtzman

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Eliot Spitzer Jokes

Tuesday March 11, 2008
Eliot Spitzer Prostitution Scandal Cartoon "The big new scandal breaking here in New York, Eliot Spitzer apparently involved in some kind of prostitution activities -- you know what that means?: Hookers. And right now, Spitzer is huddling with his advisers to develop a drinking problem." --David Letterman

"Gov. Spitzer responded just a few hours ago. He said, quote, 'I violated my obligations to my family and I violated my sense of what is right and wrong.' Spitzer also admitted violating someone named Amber." --Conan O'Brien

"Eliot Spitzer admitted publicly that he was involved in a prostitution ring, which means Hillary Clinton, now, only the second angriest wife in the state of New York." --Jay Leno

Eliot Spitzer Client 9 Cartoon "According to the FBI wiretap, they had the transcript, Gov. Spitzer was listed as Client No.9. No. 9? He's the governor, who were the eight guys in front of him? You'd think as governor, you'd at least get to go first." --Jay Leno

"This is the guy who vowed to clean up New York. But to be fair, he did bring prostitution to its knees one girl at a time." --Jay Leno

"Here's what happened, it was one of those sting deals. And they caught Eliot Spitzer, Gov. Spitzer, with a wire, recording him soliciting a prostitute. And I'm thinking, 'Holy cow, we can't get Bin Laden, but we got Spitzer. We got Sptizer.'" --David Letterman

"The thinking is the governor may step down now to spend less time with his family. The good thing is, he was caught soliciting a hooker, but on the bright side, it did not involve an airport men's room." --David Letterman

Read more Eliot Spitzer jokes...

Watch late-night joke highlight reel...

David Letterman's Top Ten Eliot Spitzer Excuses:

10. Oh come on, like you were never involved in a prostitution ring.
8. Just trying to help the economy.
7. Have you ever been to Albany?
1. I thought Bill Clinton legalized this years ago (Watch video clip)

See also:
Eliot Spitzer Cartoons (About.com)
Funny Spitzer Pictures (About.com)
Spitzer's Troubles Ready-Made for Jokes (AP)
Text Messages Found on Eliot Spitzer's Phone (23/6)
Spitzer Resigns From Emperors VIP Club (Borowitz Report)
Jon Stewart on the Spitzer Scandal (Daily Show)
Eliot Spitzer's Blog (Newsgroper)
T-Shirts Poke Fun at Spitzer Scandal (Reuters)
Pictorial Tour of Spitzer's Favorite Online Brothel (Wonkette)

Related:
Late-Night Political Jokes
Political Cartoons of the Week
Larry Craig Jokes

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