Daniel Kurtzman's Political Humor Blog

"Tonight is a night of celebration. This great land we live in has reached an exciting milestone in the war on terror [on screen: news coverage saying that the terror watch list added its 1 millionth person]. ... The terror watch list is hitting the big 1-0-0-0-0-0, oh! You know that expression 'kick ass and take names?' It turns out this country is really good at one of those. We take a lot of names. It really is an incredible accomplishment.” --Jon Stewart

“According to a new poll -- true story -- most voters think Barack Obama has a better smile than John McCain. That's what they're saying. They say he has a better smile than John McCain. Yeah, apparently, this is because McCain takes his smile out every night and puts it in a glass of water.” --Conan O’Brien

“Did you see that Indymac Bank that collapsed here in California? All those poor people waiting in line -- my God. But the Feds say not to worry if your money's in a bank, because the government will guarantee it will be there. Remember, they also guaranteed WMDs and guaranteed New Orleans that FEMA would show up. Consider the source!” --Jay Leno

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The New Yorker tried to take a swipe at Obama bashers with its controversial cover cartoon depicting Barack Obama dressed in Muslim garb fist-bumping his Afro-wearing, machine gun-toting wife in the Oval Office. Instead what it delivered was one of the most dramatic failures of political satire in recent memory.

Here's a roundup of reaction to the cartoon scandal:

Obama spokesman Bill Burton: "The New Yorker may think, as one of their staff explained to us, that their cover is a satirical lampoon of the caricature Senator Obama’s right-wing critics have tried to create. But most readers will see it as tasteless and offensive. And we agree."

Artist Barry Blitt, creator of the cartoon, defended himself by saying, "It seemed to me that depicting the concept would show it as the fear-mongering ridiculousness that it is."

Cartoonist Daryl Cagle: "A cartoon that fails to communicate its message in a way that readers understand is nothing more than a bad cartoon."

Cartoonist Ted Rall: "If The New Yorker wants to get into the political cartoon business, it ought to hire some political cartoonists. Until they hire some smart editors, The New Yorker ought to stick to what they do well: gag panels about Upper East Siders at cocktail parties."

Jon Stewart, meanwhile, took on the media and Obama for overreacting to the Obama cartoon: "Obama’s camp initially agreed that the cartoon was, quote, tasteless and offensive. Really? You know what your response should have been? It’s very easy. Here, let me put the statement out for you. Barack Obama is in no way upset about the cartoon that depicts him as a Muslim extremist, because you know who gets upset about cartoons? Muslim extremists. Of which Barack Obama is not. It’s just a f**king cartoon!” (Watch video clip)

Stephen Colbert also chimed in: "I like this because I finally understand a cartoon in The New Yorker." (Watch video clip)

Take Our Poll: What do you think of The New Yorker's Obama cartoon?

1) It's offensive and unfunny
2) It's effective satire
3) It's just a cartoon. Why is everyone overreacting?

See also:
Cartoons Lampooning The New Yorker Cartoon (About.com Political Humor)
Satire, Like Most Art, Is In The Eye of the Beholder (About.com US Politics)
Satire on the Street (The Daily Show)
A Detailed Analysis of the New Yorker Fallout in Cartoon Form (23/6)
Want Obama in a Punch Line? First, Find a Joke (NY Times)
Obama Releases List of Approved Jokes About Himself (Borowitz Report)
Obama Unfunny? You Be the Judge (Politico)

Have you been swept up by Obamamania, or are you a full-fledged McCainiac? Take these handy quizzes and we'll gauge your level of support for the 2008 presidential candidates.

• The Barack Obama Loyalty Quiz
• The John McCain Loyalty Quiz

President Bush has made so many inane statements over the years, it should no longer come as a surprise when he commits a jaw-dropping gaffe on the international stage.

But in his parting words to British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and French President Nicolas Sarkozy at his final G-8 Summit, Bush managed to outdo himiself. "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter," he said, punching the air and grinning widely as the two leaders looked on in shock.

Bush also had another embarrassing episode in which he addressed the Italian prime minster in Spanish. "Amigo! Amigo!" he called out to Silvio Berlusconi, whom the White House had previously insulted in a press packet which described him as one of the "most controversial leaders in the history of a country known for government corruption and vice."

But on the bright side, at least Bush didn't curse to anyone with his mouth full of food or grope any foreign dignitaries, as he did at previous G-8 summits.

Poll: What phrase best describes your opinion of President Bush?

1) Strong leader
2) Miserable failure
3) Honest straight-talker
4) Arrogant liar
5) Christian patriot
6) Clueless moron
7) Disastrous decider

Related:
Recent Bushisms
Best Bush Jokes & Cartoons
Bush Sings Farewell Song
Bush Gropes German Chancellor at G-8 Summit

After Jesse Jackson was caught on mic this week taking a foul-mouthed swipe at Barack Obama, the cable-news talking heads provided some unintended comedy as they squeamishly danced around the remarks.

Here's what Jackson said: "See, Barack's been talking down to black people on this faith-based...I want to cut his nuts off." (Watch video clip)

And here's how various reporters tried to characterize it:

"Cutting off his you-know-what," stammered one CNN reporter

"Manhood, er, genitals," explained another flustered reporter.

"Something that only a man would have," clarified yet another.

"Threatened to emasculate him," MSNBC's Pat Buchanan and Joe Scarborough concurred.

"The suggestion really was castration, if you will!" offered CNN's Wolf Blitzer.

Yes we will! Watch the nutty highlight reel, courtesy of 23/6.

Speaking of idiotic quotes, here's this week's runner-up:

"We have sort of become a nation of whiners." --McCain economic adviser Phil Gramm, on worries about the slumping economy, adding that the current downturn is a "mental recession"

There clearly is a mental recession in America, and exhibit A appears to be McCain's brain trust.

Related:
Embarrassing Campaign Moments
Stupid Campaign Quotes
Obama Humor Roundup

From The Onion:

President Bush will seek to comfort victims of his presidency as they try to make sense of the destruction he has caused.

Watch the video, plus check out more Bush spoof videos.

Related:
Bush Humor Roundup
Funny Bush Pictures
Bushisms

A roundup of the latest political insanity:

• Watch John McCain squirm and squint after being asked a question about Viagra

• The news that Iran had apparently altered a photo of a missile test has touched off Photoshop mockery across the Web

• Borowitz Report: McCain Issues Top Ten Funniest Ways to Kill Iranians

• Last week FOX News aired altered photos of two New York Times reporters in an attempt to embarrass them. Now you can learn to Photoshop just like FOX News, courtesy of 23/6. Plus, check out Vanity Fair's Photoshop of Horrors, featuring retouched photos of Bill O'Reilly, Geraldo Rivera, and Co.

• John McCain and Barack Obama square off at the Beijing Olympics in the latest animated cartoon by Walt Handelsman of Newsday

• 23/6 presents a tribute to Jesse Helms in his own words

• Michael Kinsley writes about Al Franken's campaign quandary: how to explain away the bad jokes (Slate)

• Humor critic Paul Lewis looks at the cultural phenomenon behind "Achmed, the Dead Terrorist," which has been seen on YouTube some 50 million times

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All of the late-night shows were in reruns this week, so we've compiled some of the best Obama and McCain jokes from recent weeks to fill the humor void:

"Now that Barack Obama is the Democratic nominee, Americans are going to have to choose between the 46-year-old Obama and the 71-year-old John McCain. That's the choice. In other words, it's a choice between the Hillary-defeater or the Wal-Mart greeter." --Conan O'Brien

"Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton campaigned for the first time together in Unity, New Hampshire, today. Isn't that cute? Unity, New Hampshire. For real. Their tour goes from Unity to Tolerate, Rhode Island; and Getting on My Nerves, Virginia; and then Crazy Makeup Sex, California." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Barack Obama said today that he is going to fight for votes in all 50 states. Yeah. That's what he said. Meanwhile, John McCain said he's going to fight for votes in all 13 colonies." --Conan O'Brien

"You know. People really like Barack Obama because he's an inspirational speaker. But he was not the first one -- I was checking my presidential history -- he was not the first candidate to use the phrase 'Yes we can!' Bill Clinton frequently used that on interns." --David Letterman

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Watch the latest spoof videos lampooning the presidential candidates and catch up on recent classics, including "John McCain's C-Word Moment," "I'm Voting Republican Because I'm an Idiot," SNL's Clinton-Obama Ad, and more.

More Campaign Comedy
Best Election Humor
Funniest Campaign Moments
2008 Election Cartoons