| The Wit and Wisdom of George W. Bush | ||||||||||||
| Witty Quips from the 2004 Campaign Trial | ||||||||||||
(For Bushisms, click here) Compiled by Daniel Kurtzman "Kerry said about Tora Bora, 'I think we've been smart. I think administration leadership has done well, and we are on the right track.' End quote. All I can say is that I am George W. Bush, and I approve of that message." "To
listen to them, to stand up straight and not scowl." --after being asked in
the third presidential
debate what he learned from the women in his life "I
own a timber company? That's news to me. Need some wood?" –- "That
answer almost made me want to scowl." –-during the second presidential
debate, referring to his exasperated
facial expressions during the first debate "It's
been a little tough to prepare for the debates, because he keeps "When
the competition includes Ted Kennedy, that's really saying something. ... You
might even say it was 'hard work,'" –-on a magazine naming Kerry the
nation's most liberal Senator "You
hear all that and you can understand why somebody would make a "America
saw two very different visions of our country, and two different hairdos."
--on the vice presidential debate "You may have noticed I have a few flaws, too. People sometimes have to correct my English. I knew I had a problem when Arnold Schwarzenegger started doing it." --during his Republican Convention speech "He
uses unique English to confuse the opponents. Kind of sounds like the strategy I
use at the press conferences." --on meeting a Denver hockey player from the
Czech Republic "My
opponent clearly has strong beliefs -- they just don't last very long." "Those
weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere!" –-joking about his
administration's failure to find WMDs in Iraq as he narrated a comic slideshow
during the Radio & TV Correspondents' Association dinner "I
was going to start off tonight by telling some self-deprecating jokes, but then
I couldn't think of any mistakes I've made to be self-deprecating about."
–-at the White House Correspondents' dinner, poking "It
really gets me when the critics say I haven't done enough for the "He
spent two decades in Congress; he's built up quite a record. In fact, Senator
Kerry has been in Washington long enough to take both sides on just about every
issue." "Maybe
(Kerry) was hoping Saddam Hussein would lose the next Iraqi
election." --on Kerry's opposition to Bush's invasion plan to topple
Saddam, even though Kerry admitted he was a threat ~Compiled by Daniel Kurtzman Read Funny Quotes by John Kerry Did we miss a funny quote? Email it to politicalhumor.guide@about.com Related Links |
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