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Texans in Hell
A group of
Texans are driving down the road, whooping it up, drinking beer and shooting off
their guns when they get into an accident with busload of nuns and orphans,
killing everyone. The Texans go straight to Hell. When they arrive the Devil is
shocked to see that they are not in agony over the heat and he demands an
explanation.
"Well,
sir, we're from Texas, and we're used to the heat," says one. This
infuriates the Devil and he cranks the thermostat up to its highest setting. The
lost souls all over hell start wailing. "I'll check on them in the morning
and see how they like THIS." He snorts and disappears in a ball of fire.
The
next morning, the Devil shows up at the Texans' camp site, and sure enough they
are showing some signs of discomfort. They have taken off their 10 Gallon hats
and are fanning themselves. One has even rolled up his sleeves. "Well,
sir," explains a Texan, "when you have been on a cattle drive in
Lubbock during August, this ain't hardly nothing." The Devil is now so
angry he is seeing red.
"Those
damn Texans seem immune to heat, let 's see what happens when I turn OFF the
heat," he says as he heads to the thermostat. "I'll check on them
tomorrow."
So
in the morning the Devil arrives at the Texans' campsite, and they are all
whoopin' and hollerin' and drinkin' the beers from the ice chest in the back of
the pick up, now that they have ice to chill them with. The wail of the lost
souls is deafening but the Texans are partyin' like there is no tomorrow.
"I
don't get it," the Devil says, completely defeated. "I tried to roast
you and it had no effect, and then I tried to freeze you and you are partying.
You Texans are made of tough stuff. But why are you celebrating?"
A Texan takes
a swig from a Bud in a longneck and replies, "Look around! Hell is frozen
over. That's just gotta mean there is another Bush in the White House."
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