From Daniel Kurtzman,
Your Guide to Political Humor.
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John McCain:

"Well, it's common knowledge and has been reported in the media that Al Qaeda is going back into Iran and receiving training and are coming back into Iraq from Iran. That's well known. And it's unfortunate." -before correcting himself by saying Iran was training "extremists," not Al Qaeda (Watch video clip)

"I will conduct a respectful debate. Now, it will be dispirited -- it will be spirited -- because there are stark differences. I am a proud conservative, liberal Republica-- conservative Republican...Hello? Easy there." (Watch video clip)

"Make it a hundred...That would be fine with me." -to a questioner who asked if he supported President Bush's vision for keeping U.S. troops in Iraq for 50 years

"I'm going to be honest: I know a lot less about economics than I do about military and foreign policy issues. I still need to be educated."

"F**k you! I know more about this than anyone else in the room." --to Sen. John Cornyn (R-TX), during a testy exchange about immigration legislation

"There are neighborhoods in Baghdad where you and I could walk through those neighborhoods today." --prior to visiting a Baghdad market while being flanked by 22 soldiers, 10 armored Humvees, and two Apache attack helicopters

"You know that old Beach Boys song, Bomb Iran? Bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran." (Watch video clip)

"I had something picked out for you, too - a little IED (improvised explosive device) to put on your desk." --to Jon Stewart

Hillary Clinton:

"Senator Obama says he is getting tired of the campaign, his supporters say they want it to end. Could you imagine if Rocky Balboa had gotten half way up those art museum stairs and said, 'Well, I guess that's about far enough.' When it comes to finishing the fight, Rocky and I have a lot in common. I never quit, I never give up and I know that were going to make it together, not just up those stairs, but were going to climb that mountain for a better day for America."

"I remember landing under sniper fire. There was supposed to be some kind of a greeting ceremony at the airport, but instead we just ran with our heads down to get into the vehicles to get to our base." --on visiting Bosnia in 1996, contradicting other accounts that said there was no threat of gunfire. Clinton later said she "misspoke"

"On a couple of occasions in the last weeks, I just said some things that I knew not to be the case." --on misspeaking about her Bosnia visit

"The question is, we face a lot of dangers in the world and, in the gentleman's words, we face a lot of evil men. And what in my background equips me to deal with evil and bad men?" --laughing off a question from a voter who asked Clinton what qualified her to deal with leaders from countries such as Iran and North Korea

"I just want to add, I did not say that it should be done, but I certainly recognize why Gov. Spitzer is trying to do it. And we have failed." --responding in a Democratic debate to New York Gov. Elliot Spitzer's plan to give drivers' licenses to illegal immigrants. Moments earlier, Clinton had said, "They are driving on our roads. The possibility of them having an accident that harms themselves or others is just a matter of the odds."

"Aww don't feel noways tired. I've come too faarrr from where I started frum." --adopting a Southern drawl while speaking at a church (Watch video clip)

"We are going to take things away from you on behalf of the common good."

"God bless the America we are trying to create."

"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president."

Barack Obama:

"Hold on one second, sweetie, we're going to do -- we'll do a press avail." --to a female reporter for ABC's Detroit affiliate who asked about his plan to help American autoworkers

"I've now been in 57 states -- I think one left to go." --at a campaign event in Beaverton, Oregon (Watch video clip)

"Why can't I just eat my waffle?" --after being asked a foreign policy question by a reporter while visiting a diner in Pennsylvania

"It's not surprising, then, they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren't like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations." --explaining his troubles winning over some working-class voters

"The point I was making was not that Grandmother harbors any racial animosity. She doesn't. But she is a typical white person, who, if she sees somebody on the street that she doesn't know, you know, there's a reaction that's been bred in our experiences that don't go away and that sometimes come out in the wrong way, and that's just the nature of race in our society."

"Come on! I just answered, like, eight questions." --exasperated by reporters after a news conference

"In case you missed it, this week, there was a tragedy in Kansas. Ten thousand people died -- an entire town destroyed." --on a Kansas tornado that killed 12 people

Mike Huckabee:

"When we were in college we used to take a popcorn popper -- because that was the only thing they would let us have in the dorms -- and fry squirrels in the popcorn popper." (Watch video clip)

"I'm pretty sure there will be duck-hunting in heaven and I can't wait!"

"And the ultimate thing is, I may not be the expert that some people are on foreign policy, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night."

Mitt Romney:

"I saw my father march with Martin Luther King." (Romney's campaign later admitted that they didn't march on the same day, or in the same city)

"My sons are all adults and they've made decisions about their careers and they've chosen not to serve in the military and active duty and I respect their decision in that regard. One of the ways my sons are showing support for our nation is helping me get elected because they think I'd be a great president."

"PETA is not happy that my dog likes fresh air." --on strapping his dog to the top of the car

~Compiled by Daniel Kurtzman