• Newt Gingrich Jokes
• Dumbest Quotes by the GOP Candidates
"Go get a job after you take a bath." —Newt Gingrich, speaking in November 2011 about Occupy Wall Street protesters
"It is tragic what we do in the poorest neighborhoods, entrapping children in child laws which are truly stupid…These schools should get rid of unionized janitors, have one master janitor, pay local students to take care of the school." —Newt Gingrich on abolishing child labor laws
"There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate." -- Newt Gingrich, explaining in 2011 why he cheated on his first two wives. He carried on the first affair while his wife was suffering from cancer, and the second while he was orchestrating Bill Clinton's impeachment.
"I have two grandchildren -- Maggie is 11, Robert is 9. I am convinced that if we do not decisively win the struggle over the nature of America, by the time they're my age they will be in a secular atheist country, potentially one dominated by radical Islamists and with no understanding of what it once meant to be an American." --Newt Gingrich in March 2011
"We don't do --you know, we don't do elaborate things. ... Well, go, you go talk to Tiffany's. All I'm telling you is we --we are very frugal." -- Newt Gingrich, in response to the revelation that he and his wife once owed between $250,000 and $500,000 in a credit account to the jeweler Tiffany's (May 2011)
"I have six times as many Twitter followers as all the other candidates combined, but it didn't count because if it counted I'd still be a candidate; since I can't be a candidate that can't count." -- Newt Gingrich, complaining that the press was ignoring his prodigious Twitter following, which had numbered over 1.3 million people. More than 90% of those followers, however, turned out to be fake -- the result of Gingrich's campaign hiring a firm to boost his follower count by creating dummy accounts en masse. (August 1, 2011)
“There’s a large part of me that’s four years old. I wake up in the morning and I know that somewhere there’s a cookie. I don’t know where it is but I know it’s mine and I have to go find it. That’s how I live my life. My life is amazingly filled with fun.” —Newt Gingrich, describing himself in a 2010 Esquire profile
“If combat means living in a ditch, females have biological problems staying in a ditch for thirty days because they get infections and they don’t have upper body strength. I mean, some do, but they’re relatively rare. On the other hand, men are basically little piglets, you drop them in the ditch, they roll around in it, doesn’t matter, you know. These things are very real. On the other hand, if combat means being on an Aegis-class cruiser managing the computer controls for twelve ships and their rockets, a female may be again dramatically better than a male who gets very, very frustrated sitting in a chair all the time because males are biologically driven to go out and hunt giraffes.” —Newt Gingrich in 1995
"A mere forty years ago, beach volleyball was just beginning. No bureaucrat would have invented it, and that's what freedom is all about." –Newt Gingrich
"She's not young enough or pretty enough to be the wife of a President. And besides, she has cancer.'" --Newt Gingrich, reportedly speaking to a friend in 1980 about why he was divorcing his first wife
"Suddenly the pouting sex kitten gave way to Diana the Huntress. She rolled onto him and somehow was sitting athwart his chest, her knees pinning his shoulders. 'Tell me, or I will make you do terrible things,' she hissed." —excerpt from the novel 1945 written by Newt Gingrich
"The problem isn’t too little money in political campaigns, but not enough."
"The idea that a Congressman would be tainted by accepting money from private industry or private sources is essentially a socialist argument."
"I have enormous personal ambition. I want to shift the entire planet. And I'm doing it. I am now a famous person. I represent real power."
"I'm not a natural leader. I'm too intellectual; I'm too abstract; I think too much."
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