Jeb Bush Jokes

"Bush said his brother, Jeb, would make a great president. That's all we need. Big Brother's little brother." --Bill Maher

"President Bush said he'd like to see his brother, Jeb, become president. Great campaign slogan -- 'Jeb Bush: Couldn't do any worse.'" --Jay Leno

"The president said his brother Jeb 'would be a great president.' I guess we voted for the wrong one then." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Florida Gov. Jeb Bush says he wants to be president. Well that's good, somebody will have to pardon his brother." --David Letterman

"Rumor is that President Bush's brother, Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, may run for president. Rumor is? According to Florida voting machines, he's already won." --Jay Leno

"Jeb Bush now says he would like to be president, and I think I speak for all Americans when I say, 'When can you start, Jeb?'" --David Letterman

"George Bush's brother Jeb, who is the governor of Florida, says he wants to be president. And you can't blame him. Right now the Bush name is magic." --David Letterman

"Governor Jeb Bush of Florida has announced he might run for president, because how many times have you thought to yourself that all we need is one more Bush in the White House? Actually, experts say he's a shoe-in because he owns all of the crooked voting machines." --David Letterman

"The big question, what's going to get dried out first, New Orleans or Gov. Jeb Bush's son? You hear about this? President Bush's nephew, John Ellis Bush, who is Jeb Bush's son, was arrested for public drunkenness and resisting arrest. Apparently the family's concerned that this behavior will hurt his chances of having a political career. But it didn't hurt Uncle George" --Jay Leno

"It was so hot down in Florida Jeb Bush was rigging ice machines." --David Letterman

"Condoleezza Rice was confirmed by a vote of 85, 13, despite a contentious but futile protest vote by democrats. By the way, for a fun second term drinking game, chug a beer every time you hear the phrase 'contentious but futile protest vote by democrats.' By the time Jeb Bush is elected, you'll be so wasted you won't even notice the war in Syria." --Jon Stewart

"Florida Governor Jeb Bush announced that to avoid any election return problems in Florida this year, this time he is going to announce the results before people go into vote." --Jay Leno

"Governor Jeb Bush of Florida announced he was running for re-election. Not only did he announce he was running for re-election, he also announced what his final vote count would be." —Jay Leno

"There have been rumors swirling around Florida that Florida Gov. Jeb Bush had been cheating on his wife. But he says no, that's not true, technically he wasn't cheating, they only had dimpled sex. That's when it doesn't go all the way." —Jay Leno

"Actually, he especially denied having an affair with Florida Secretary of State Katherine Harris. I believe him, I don't think he did. An affair with Katherine Harris? How much makeup would that leave on your collar? ... He said as a Republican, the only people he's been in bed with are the tobacco industry and the gun lobby." —Jay Leno

"Actually they said they don't really know how many women (Jeb Bush) has been with because since it is Florida, they're still counting. ... Boy talk about switches. During the last administration the president was accused of infidelity and his brother was an idiot. Now it is the other way around." —Jay Leno

"Jeb Bush went on TV the other day to deny rumors that he had a sexual relationship with a former Playboy Playmate. Oh! As a guy, that's got to kill you doesn't it? Having to deny to your friends that you had sex with a Playmate, even if you did." —Jay Leno

"Congratulations to Massachusetts Governor Jane Swift. She gave birth to twin girls yesterday. First time a governor has given birth to twins. She got a lot of calls. Governor Jeb Bush from Florida called her, not to congratulate her — just to deny that he was the father." —Jay Leno