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Joe Biden Quotes

Funny Quotes by Vice President Joe Biden

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Vice President Biden Addresses U.S. Conference Of Mayors In Las Vegas
Ethan Miller/Getty Images News/Getty Images
See Also: Dumbest Joe Biden Quotes Ever

"My mother believed and my father believed that if I wanted to be president of the United States, I could be, I could be Vice President!" --Joe Biden

"Folks, I can tell you I've known eight presidents, three of them intimately." --Joe Biden

"I promise you, the president has a big stick. I promise you." --Joe Biden, citing Theodore Roosevelt's famous quote, "Speak softly and carry a big stick"

"[David] Axelrod really wanted me to do this on teleprompter -- but I told him I'm much better when I wing it. I know these evenings run long, so I'm going to be brief. Talk about the audacity of hope. President Obama does send his greetings, though. He can't be here tonight -- because he's busy getting ready for Easter. He thinks it's about him." --Joe Biden, at the 2009 Gridiron dinner

"Look, John's last-minute economic plan does nothing to tackle the number-one job facing the middle class, and it happens to be, as Barack says, a three-letter word: jobs. J-O-B-S, jobs." --Joe Biden

"A man I'm proud to call my friend. A man who will be the next President of the United States — Barack America!" --Joe Biden, at his first campaign rally with Barack Obama (Watch video clip)

"If your kitchen table is like mine, you sit there at night before you put the kids to bed and you talk about what you need. You talk about how much you are worried about being able to pay the bills. Ladies and gentlemen, that is not a worry John McCain has to worry about. It's a pretty hard experience. He'll have to figure out which of the seven kitchen tables to sit at." --Joe Biden

"There's only three things he mentions in a sentence -- a noun, a verb, and 9/11." --Joe Biden, on Rudy Giuliani (Watch video clip)

"I should start with an apology to Rudy Giuliani. I said every sentence Rudy utters has a noun, a verb, and 9/11 in it. I was wrong. He called me to tell me after Pat Robertson's endorsement, there's an Amen in every sentence he says too." --Joe Biden

"Yes." --Joe Biden, giving a one-word answer during a Democratic debate to NBC Anchor Brian Wiliams, who cited criticism of Biden's "uncontrolled verbosity" and tendency to be a “gaffe machine” in asking whether he would "have the discipline you would need on the world stage" (Watch video clip)

"I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, that's a storybook, man." --Joe Biden on Barack Obama

"I got tested for AIDS. I know Barack got tested for AIDS. There's no shame in being tested for AIDS. It's an important thing."

"You cannot go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent.... I'm not joking." --Joe Biden

~Compiled by Daniel Kurtzman
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