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Palinisms

Dumb Sarah Palin Quotes, Gaffes and Lies

By

Sarah Palin Addresses Florida Republican Party Victory Dinner
Roberto Gonzalez/Getty Images News/Getty Images

See Also:
Craziest Sarah Palin Quotes Ever
Funny Sarah Palin Pictures
Best Sarah Palin Cartoons

"Mr. President, the only thing that stops a bad guy with a nuke is a good guy with a nuke." --Sarah Palin, on how President Obama should deal with Russian President Vladimir Putin, CPAC speech, March 8, 2014

"Polls are for strippers and cross-country skiers" –Sarah Palin, speaking at a Tea Party rally in Iowa, Sept. 3, 2011

"If we were really domestic terrorists, President Obama would want to be palling around with us." --Sarah Palin, on allegations that Vice President Joe Biden referred to the Tea Party as acting like "terrorists" in the debt ceiling standoff, which Biden denied, Aug. 2, 2011

"[Paul Revere] did warn the British. And in a shout-out, gotcha-type of question that was asked of me, I answered candidly. And I know my American history." --Sarah Palin, defending her botched Paul Revere history lesson by taking issue with the reporter, who simply asked her "What have you seen so far today, and what are you going to take away from your visit?" (Fox News Sunday interview, June 5, 2011)

"He who warned, uh, the British that they weren't gonna be takin' away our arms, uh, by ringing those bells, and um, makin' sure as he's riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be sure and we were going to be free, and we were going to be armed." --Sarah Palin, on Paul Revere's midnight ride, June 3, 2011

"I love that smell of the emissions!" --Sarah Palin, at a motorcycle rally in Washington, D.C., where she rode in on a Harley, May 29, 2011

"I haven't heard the president state that we're at war. That's why I too am not knowing -- do we use the term intervention? Do we use war? Do we use squirmish? What is it?" --Sarah Palin, on the U.S. and NATO bombing of Libya, March 29, 2011

"Especially within hours of a tragedy unfolding, journalists and pundits should not manufacture a blood libel that serves only to incite the very hatred and violence they purport to condemn. That is reprehensible." --Sarah Palin, defending her fiery campaign rhetoric in the wake of the Arizona shooting massacre by invoking a phrase ("blood libel") that typically refers historically to the alleged murder of Christian babies by Jews, Jan. 12, 2011

"Because of that one episode, that one episode, that would turn an issue into what it has become over the last two years. I think that's ridiculous. That's one of those things, where that issue...that I don't read, or that I'm not informed, it's one of those questions where I like to turn that around and ask the reporters, 'Why would it be that there is that perception that I don't read?'" --Sarah Palin, ABC interview with Barbara Walters, Dec. 9, 2010

"But obviously, we've got to stand with our North Korean allies." --Sarah Palin, after being asked how she would handle the current hostilities between the two Koreas, interview on Glenn Beck's radio show, Nov. 24, 2010

"I want to help clean up the state that is so sorry today of journalism. And I have a communications degree." --Sarah Palin, Fox News interview with Sean Hannity, Nov. 22, 2010

"Who hijacked term: 'feminist'? A cackle of rads who want 2 crucify other women w/whom they disagree on a singular issue; it's ironic (& passé)" --Sarah Palin, in a Twitter message, Aug. 18, 2010

"Dr. Laura: don't retreat...reload! (Steps aside bc her 1st Amend.rights ceased 2exist thx 2activists trying 2silence "isn't American,not fair")" --Sarah Palin, in a Twitter message coming to the defense of Dr. Laura Schlessinger, the talk radio host who apologized and decided to retire from her highly-rated program after using the N-word on the air 11 times in 5 minutes, Aug. 18, 2010

"As we work and sightsee on America's largest island, we'll get to view more majestic bears, so now is a good time to draw attention to the political equivalent of the species." --Sarah Palin, referring to Kodiak Island in Alaska, even though Hawaii is America's biggest island, July 19, 2010

"Ground Zero Mosque supporters: doesn't it stab you in the heart, as it does ours throughout the heartland? Peaceful Muslims, pls refudiate." --a Tweet by Sarah Palin, which she quickly removed after being ridiculed for inventing the word "refudiate," July 18, 2010

"Peaceful New Yorkers, pls refute the Ground Zero mosque plan if you believe catastrophic pain caused @ Twin Towers site is too raw, too real." --a second Tweet by Sarah Palin, which she also removed after misusing the word "refute," July 18, 2010

"'Refudiate,' 'misunderestimate,' 'wee-wee'd up.' English is a living language. Shakespeare liked to coin new words too. Got to celebrate it!'" --a follow-up Tweet by Sarah Palin, proudly mistaking her illiteracy for literary genius, July 18, 2010

"[Barack and Michelle Obama] have power in their words. They could refudiate what it is that this group is saying." –Sarah Palin, on the NAACP charge of racism in the Tea Party movement, The Sean Hannity Show, Fox News, July 14, 2010

"We have a President, perhaps for the very first time since the founding of our republic, who doesn't appear to believe that America is the greatest earthly force for good the world has ever known." --Sarah Palin, Facebook note, June 30, 2010

"I would have waived the Jones Act, and some unions not might not like it, not union membership, but the union leaders, too many, who are thugs." --Sarah Palin, speaking at the Oil Palace in Tyler, Texas, June 26, 2010

"This is Reagan country (applause). Yeah! And perhaps it was destiny that the man who went to California's Eureka College would become so woven within and inter-linked to the Golden State." --Sarah Palin, blundering on Reagan's education while speaking at a fundraiser at California State University-Stanislaus. Eureka College is in Illinois. (June 25, 2010)

"What the federal government should have done is accept the assistance of foreign countries, of entrepreneurial Americans who have had solution that they wanted presented ... The Dutch and the Norwegians, they are known for dikes and for cleaning up water and for dealing with spills." --Sarah Palin, on solving the Gulf oil spill crisis, Fox News, June 15, 2010

"Shoot, I must have lived such a doggoned sheltered life as a normal, independent American up there in the Last Frontier, schooled with only public education and a lowly state university degree, because obviously I haven't learned enough to dismiss common sense." --Sarah Palin, on opposition to offshore oil drilling, Facebook note, June 13, 2010

"Here's an example of how it wastes some time. To be judged on or to be talked about on appearance—say chest size—it makes me wear layers, it makes me have to waste time figuring out what am I going to wear so that nobody will look in an area that I don't need them to look at." --Sarah Palin, Fox interview with Greta Van Susteren, June 12, 2010

"Unless government appropriately regulates oil developments and holds oil executives accountable, the public will not trust them to drill, baby, drill. And we must!" --Sarah Palin, Facebook note, June 8, 2010

"Extreme deep water drilling is not the preferred choice to meet our country's energy needs, but your protests and lawsuits and lies about onshore and shallow water drilling have locked up safer areas. It's catching up with you. The tragic, unprecedented deep water Gulf oil spill proves it." --Sarah Palin, blaming the Gulf oil spill disaster on "extreme environmentalists," Facebook note, June 2, 2010

"I think it's appalling and a violation of our freedom of the press." –Sarah Palin, speaking about the negative media coverage of Republican congressional candidate Vaughn Ward, Boise, Idaho, May 21, 2010

"We're all Arizonans now." --Sarah Palin, defending Arizona's new law cracking down on illegal immigration, May 15, 2010

"Go back to what our founders and our founding documents meant -- they're quite clear -- that we would create law based on the God of the bible and the Ten Commandments." –-Sarah Palin, arguing that Judeo-Christian belief was the basis for American law and should continue to be used as a guiding force for creating future legislation, interview with Bill O'Reilly, May 6, 2010

"We used to hustle over the border for health care we received in Canada. And I think now, isn't that ironic?" --Sarah Palin, admitting that her family used to get treatment in Canada's single-payer health care system, despite having demonized such government-run programs as socialized medicine that will lead to death-panel-like rationing, March 6, 2010

Sarah Palin, on writing notes on her hand during her Tea Party convention speech: "I didn't really had a good answer, as so often -- is me. But then somebody sent me the other day, Isaiah 49:16, and you need to go home and look it up. Before you look it up, I'll tell you what it says though. It says, hey, if it was good enough for God, scribbling on the palm of his hand, it's good enough for me, for us. He says, in that passage, 'I wrote your name on the palm of my hand to remember you,' and I'm like, 'Okay, I'm in good company.'" (March 5, 2010)

"They are kooks, so I agree with Rush Limbaugh. Rush Limbaugh was using satire ... I didn't hear Rush Limbaugh calling a group of people whom he did not agree with 'f-ing retards,' and we did know that Rahm Emanuel, as has been reported, did say that. There is a big difference there." --Sarah Palin, attempting to rationalize why it's okay for Limbaugh to use the word "retards" but not Emanuel, FOX News Sunday interview, Feb. 7, 2010

"Who calls a shot like that? Who makes a decision like that? It's a disturbing trend." –Sarah Palin, pushing a conspiracy theory that "In God We Trust" had been moved to the edge of coins by the Obama administration (the change was made by the Bush administration in 2007 and was later reversed by Congress, before Obama took office), West Allis, Wisconsin, Nov. 6, 2009

"The America I know and love is not one in which my parents or my baby with Down Syndrome will have to stand in front of Obama's 'death panel' so his bureaucrats can decide, based on a subjective judgment of their 'level of productivity in society,' whether they are worthy of health care. Such a system is downright evil." –-Sarah Palin, in a message posted on Facebook about Obama's health care plan, Aug. 12, 2009

"Left Unalakleet warmth for rain in Juneau tonite. No drought threat down here, ever but consistent rain reminds us: 'No rain? No rainbow!'" --one of many Tweets by Sarah Palin that William Shatner recited as poetry on "The Tonight Show"

"I think on a national level your Department of Law there in the White House would look at some of the things that we've been charged with and automatically throw them out." --Sarah Palin, referring to a department that does not exist while attempting to explain why as president she wouldn't be subjected to the same ethics investigations that compelled her to resign as governor of Alaska, ABC News interview, July 7, 2009

"How sad that Washington and the media will never understand; it's about country. And though it's honorable for countless others to leave their positions for a higher calling and without finishing a term, of course we know by now, for some reason a different standard applies for the decisions I make." --Sarah Palin, July 4, 2009

"It may be tempting and more comfortable to just keep your head down, plod along, and appease those who demand: 'Sit down and shut up,' but that's the worthless, easy path; that's a quitter's way out." --Sarah Palin, announcing her resignation as governor, July 3, 2009

"Let me go back to a comfortable analogy for me - sports... basketball. I use it because you're naive if you don't see the national full-court press picking away right now: A good point guard drives through a full court press, protecting the ball, keeping her eye on the basket... and she knows exactly when to pass the ball so that the team can WIN." --Sarah Palin, announcing her resignation, July 3, 2009

"Only dead fish go with the flow." --Sarah Palin, quitting, July 3, 2009

"Letterman certainly has the right to 'joke' about whatever he wants to, and thankfully we have the right to express our reaction. This is all thanks to our U.S. military women and men putting their lives on the line for us to secure America's Right to Free Speech - in this case, may that right be used to promote equality and respect." --Sarah Palin, misunderstanding the First Amendment, June 16, 2009

"That was fun!" --Sarah Palin, conducting an interview after pardoning a turkey for Thanksgiving while other turkeys were slaughtered in the background, Nov. 20, 2008

"I'm like, OK, God, if there is an open door for me somewhere, this is what I always pray, I'm like, don't let me miss the open door. Show me where the open door is." --Sarah Palin, on running for national office in the future, FOX News interview, Nov. 10, 2008

"John McCain and I, we love you and thank you for spending a few minutes to talk to me." --Sarah Palin, talking with Canadian radio prankster posing as French President Nicolas Sarkozy, Nov. 1, 2008 (Read more about the prank call, watch the video and see the transcript)

"Ohh, good, thank you, yes." --Sarah Palin, after the Canadian prank caller complimented her on the documentary about her life, Hustler's "Nailin Paylin," Nov. 1, 2008

"We realize that more and more Americans are starting to see the light there and understand the contrast. And we talk a lot about, OK, we're confident that we're going to win on Tuesday, so from there, the first 100 days, how are we going to kick in the plan that will get this economy back on the right track and really shore up the strategies that we need over in Iraq and Iran to win these wars?" --Sarah Palin, suggesting we are at war with Iran, FOX News interview, Nov. 1, 2008

Next > More Idiotic Palin Quotes

~Compiled by Daniel Kurtzman

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